Releasing the beauty from the stone

Jun 8, 2008 at 7:56 PM
14 comments

I've been busy finishing a class, so I haven't been posting as much as I should. I'll get back to writing about web stuff shortly, but today I wanted to share a quote from a leadership book I read for class. It talks about how people respond to criticism vs. encouragement. It -- well, the quote says it better than I would:

It’s human nature: when we’re being watched by a person who is looking for our faults, we act very differently than we do in a supportive environment in which there’s an opportunity to be rewarded for special achievements. When we know someone is looking for positive examples we’ll make an effort to reveal them. Pygmalions don’t so much carve a statue from the stone as release the beauty that’s already in it.

(From The Leadership Challenge by James Kouzes and Barry Posner)

14 comments

Comments

People tend to meet what is expected of them. So I guess we should expect the best of everyone we come in contact with. Hope your class is going well.

Scott A Bell

It's a reference to a quote from Michelangelo...

"I saw an angel in the rock...."

or something to that effect, and release it. One of the really good advocates of the Home Schooling/Education movement wrote a book with that as the title. I'll have to find it to reference it properly. The Elijah Company founder. The idea is to develop YOUR CHILD and the GIFTS of YOUR CHILD (REN) rather than focus on The School System and its (different) goals. Which is predominately create happy cubical drones who obey The Boss (right... there's always passive aggressive rebellion, hackers, or malware to express what we really feel but didn't feel safe articulating and expressing) and socialism as the common denominator.

But really we are all snowflakes.

Interestingly enough, as Romance Coach and Online Dating Coach, of course, I am very familiar with and greatly appreciate the dating class, "The Rules." Whatever you may think of TRs, the chapter on Be a Creature Unlike Any Other" (CUAOs) is quite right on.

The thing is, we are ALL CUAOs - men and women.

Be the snowflake that you are.

Enjoy your class and I look forward to your future blogging.

All the best,

April Braswell
Romance Coach, Online Dating Coach

Nice analogy. In my experience, an employee's past also has a huge impact on how they behave at work. While most respond well to encouragement (vs. criticism), a few who have been "programmed" to expect cristicism seem to find a supportive environment rather unsettling.

Yann
Yann Vernier - Personal Coach

I saw the angel in the marble

The "Leadership Challenge" is an awesome book! I read it ten years ago and still use it as a reference. It's lessons, like the practice of true leadership,stand teh test of time.

Steve Chambers
Sales and Leadership Training Expert

For the same reason, I call going through my files, (culling them, and sorting them) a Treasure Hunt. Takes what is normally a rote job of drudgery and makes me stay focused on finding nuggets that might have slipped through the cracks. I try to do this at least once a year, usually between Christmas and New Years...

Rob Northrup

Is Your Corporation Protecting You?

That's a really neat gem that you posted, and so true. It works with children, as well as adults. The only thing to be careful of is giving too much false praise for work that isn't deserving. Then it ends up backfiring on you.

I'll have to check out this book! It sounds good.

Jennifer Skinner

Wardrobe Planning, Style Development

An excellent quote with very practical applications to life, Andrew. You've, no doubt, gathered by now that I am a bit of a quote addict myself.

There is some research that points to balancing praise and constructive criticism. I recall it was one true praise for every three 'guidance' points (provided these are all done with honesty and integrity) results in the best response from another person, whether it be your child or an employee. If someone is praised too often, they tend to believe the praise is false, if too infrequently, they don't hear it. If anyone remembers the name of that study, please pass it along.

Sue Crutcher, Life Empowerment Mentor

You found a great piece there. I too have found that most will work better if your positive with your guidance. I do like how ever when someone points out that they have a conflict with my way of thinking. I feel it helps with understanding how I am portraying myself
Focus Your Energy
Matthew Shields